My Name is Kris and I Blah-g

Hi! Well, it’s been a SUPER busy summer! Really. I think I am ready for school to start just so I can get some breathing room. I have to say that I loved how my summer began. It may be no surprise to y’all but it started with a concert. w00t! Guess who?

Yup. I took that!

I scored some front row seats for this concert back in March. I was pretty excited about it. It’s been a year since Mom’s stroke and this concert would be her first “normal” thing (according to her) that she’d get to do since. I wasn’t sure how Mom would react to the loud music or how she’d be able to see. Her vision was severely impacted by the stroke and she was left blind from the tip of her nose down towards her feet and she has very little peripheral vision. Well, she did AWESOME! She loved every bit of it. Rick was a bit more risque at this show as it was in a gambling town and in a 21 and over venue. Kinda makes me wonder how he’ll be on the cruise. I am guessing pretty much the same. He didn’t stand on my sister’s chair this time and we didn’t get the bump & grind in our face either but I did manage to get a heck of a hand slap that managed to keep my fingers stinging for about 10 minutes after.

The fun continued later in July when I went out to California to visit with friends and to schmooze with some soap opera stars. But before I did that, I took a slight detour in Los Angeles and look who I ran into…

That’s right, people….

Rick was doing a book signing at the Barnes & Noble at The Grove in L.A. – which coincidentally was at the same mall as the American Girl store that I had promised Michaela I would take her to. No really… this was a TOTAL coincidence. True story!

So, that was at the beginning of my trip and really, the trip could have ended right there. I was satisfied. What a thrill… a 10 second thrill but whatever!

The rest of the week was spent with these guys:

General Hospital Fan Club Weekend was “OK”. I am highly critical though. Events such as this one that are done each year should be run like clockwork and not like it was someone’s first time. I was pretty disappointed in the level of professionalism by the event coordinators and their blatant efforts showing favoritism to certain groups of fans. It was pretty obvious and sad. I suppose some would call it sour grapes but not really. I wasn’t PERSONALLY wronged by this. It is just an observation as a first time fan club weekender. The amount of money spent to do this activity was obscene considering the value I received and I will likely not do it again. That being said, the actors themselves were gracious and kind they turned it on for the fans and that was nice to see. If I had to rate my experiences with the actors, I would say that my favorites to meet were Ronnie Marmo, Dominic Zamprogna and John J York. I had a MUCH better experience with Julie Berman than I did in December 2010 when I went out to do a house build for Habitat for Humanity. I don’t know if she was having a bad day or not but at the time I found her rude and stand offish. That was a total turn off then. But she was super cool at FCW and she was great with Michaela which mattered the most to me. As for who I didn’t care for??? Well… my daughter and I nicknamed Jason Thompson “The Bump on a Log”… Mr Personality he was not. Again, I don’t know if he was just having an off day or what. But that was THE big event and frankly he should have turned it on for the fans. He wasn’t engaged. The line to meet him and Kimberly was slower than cold tar. In hindsight I wouldn’t have stood in line to meet them. By the time I got through their line, Jonathan Jackson, Steve Burton and Maurice Bernard had already left the building. It was ridiculous. And their line wasn’t even that long either. Kinda still irks me that I wasted my time there.

So, let’s move on…

One of the activities that we got to do while we were there was a “tour” of the General Hospital set. I use that in “quotes” because I am not so sure it was a tour. I mean, I saw the Green Room and I saw the inside of a dressing room and I did stand around the set for a long time. But that was about it. I was fascinated watching the taping of the scenes and getting to see how big the sets really AREN’T. It was interesting to see that many of the sets are in storage and they move them to and fro when needed. The actual set area was quite small. We didn’t get to see wardrobe or make up or any of the many actor’s dressing rooms. And since I was a visitor it wasn’t like I could “demand it” either. I was originally told it’d be a 3 hour tour and that worked well for me because I had to pick up a friend a the airport but the majority of the tour we were left standing there with out an escort and wasn’t sure what to do. And before I knew it, I had to leave and the rest of the tour had to go on without us. I missed lunch with the actors and the goofing off on set with them after. In a word… I was disappointed. Had I known how it’d really be, I would have blocked out the entire day. Plain & simple the communication about how it really is wasn’t there. So, if you’re going to spend the big bucks to see the set, then be warned…be SUPER SUPER flexible with your time and expect the unexpected.

One of the main highlights of the trip was the play reading by Ronnie Marmo, Dominic Zamprogna, Julie Berman and Lisa LoCicero. I had created a poster for the play reading that Ronnie ended up really liking and he used it to auction off at his event to raise money for his theater group. I am proud to announce that the poster & script for the play reading fetched the highest bids of the night. Soap Opera Weekly just did a write up on the event and my poster was published in the August 16, 2011 edition:

How cool is THIS!?

So, that’s my summer so far. We’re into August and the plans for Michaela’s birthday party are in full swing. We’ll celebrate a few days before her actual birthday with hopefully several of her friends and many of her cousins. This year’s theme?? American Girl Luau. Yep. You heard that right. Expect pictures. LOTS of them.

Until then….

Of course I knew that today would be hard. It was. I just had thought that I would kinda scoot through it relatively unscathed. I mean, that is how it was for most of 2008 – I was numb most of the time but to be honest, Valentines Day – piece of cake. Memorial Day? Pretty sad but could’ve been worse. 4th of July? No problem. Michaela’s birthday, our wedding anniversary, his birthday, my birthday…Christmas and New Year’s…I was certainly reflective. At times I was sad but tears didn’t get the best of me and it left me thinking that this wasn’t going to be so bad. I don’t know if my outlook was different or maybe I just didn’t care but getting through those things was ok. But then today showed up. I posted my earlier entry at the beginning of the day when things were going ok. I had been thinking about the 1 year mark for quite a while and it occurred me not too long ago that this day would land on Fast and Testimony Sunday. Would I be able to stand before the congregation at church? I am a big enough wuss as it is when it comes to bearing my testimony. What was I thinking when I thought I could have enough gumption to get up there in front of 300+ people on the 1st anniversary of my husband’s death? Delusions of gradeur…a lunatic…brainless. You name it. I am all of those things. I should have known when I sat down in the pew and saw that the first hymn we’d sing would be “Be Still My Soul.” I saw it in the bulletin and thought, it’s just a song. Did I mention that I was brainless? The song started and no sooner had we gotten to the middle of the first verse and the tears started to flow. They came fast and furious and by the Sacrament hymn I was a full on mess of red eyes, running make up and boogers. I couldn’t stop it. In desperation I asked Debbie for some tissue and she had none. All I wanted to do was fall beneath the pew and curl up and disappear. But out of no where, my daughter proudly announced that she had tissues in her bag. At least the sleeve of my shirt was saved. Thoughts of running to the bathroom for the 3 hour duration of church crossed my mind – more than once.The bishop stood to make his remarks and among them was his recollection upon his week. He got to spend lots of time at the temple this week being witness to a marriage of a young couple and to a sealing of an entire family. Of course, that brought me back to my day in the temple with Mike and Michaela 5 years ago. That was one of the happiest times of my life. I think the years of 2002 and 2003 were quite possibly my Cinderella years. I can’t believe that time in my life happened to me. I am so blessed that it did. I can’t remember what the sealer said that day. But I can remember the mirrors that were on all the walls of the room and the look in Mike’s eyes when I knelt across the alter from him and how I sobbed through my promises to him and how I could hear Michaela who was barely 1 year old at the time freaking out in the hallway crying. Those were happy times. But today those memories were rushing through my mind so quickly that I didn’t have time to smile because no sooner had the Bishop mentioned his experience in the temple this week that he moved on to tell the congregation that he had spent the morning with a fellow church member who is in the final stages of congestive heart failure. My thoughts turned to this man’s wife and how one day very soon she will be counted among those of us who are widowed. The preparations that she is getting right now probably won’t spare her the feelings of lonliness and dispair. I am sure when he goes, she will feel as much grief as I do. However, I can’t help but envy her for the time she has been given to be with him during his final days and how she will have the opportunity to relay to him all the things that she needs to before he goes. I am assuming that she will do this. I hope she does. I also felt envy for the man himself who in his weakness he found the strength to give the Bishop a message of hope that he wanted shared with those of us. He is prepared to leave this life and start his journey in the next. He will soon see the young son he lost years ago and I am sure countless other loved ones whom he’s missed for who knows how long. And the thought occured me to me just WHO will be on the welcoming committee when he gets there? I wonder if he’ll see Mike? How crazy would I be to run over to this man’s house and give him a message to pass on to Mike when he sees him. Um..YEAH. These where thoughts that flew through my mind at this moment. And while I tried to suppress this deranged lunatic who had taken over my body today in church, the time ticked away and before I knew it Sacrament meeting was over and I was exhausted. I never made it up to the front – THANKFULLLY because who knows what kind of crazy stuff I would have said, especially since they were recording the service for this poor man. The last thing this guy needs is me freaking out and him thinking that this is the type of person that his wife may become when he leaves this earth. Sorry dude. In exchange for the lonliness we feel, you get to stand helpless on the sidelines and watch it all happen. I guess that’s the trade off.Well, anyway…I was a mess today. I thought I’d do much better than I did and I have to admit I am a little disappointed in myself for not being more stoic. Maybe next year….HA! I think January 4th should become a national holiday. If not that, then I plan on taking that day off from now on. What a humdinger that was.I will say though that the cemetery visit went ok. The sub-zero temperatures dry out the tears pretty well and make for the lingering at the grave to be kept to a minimum. That was a relief. And the impromptu visit from my brother and his family was a nice surprise. I am grateful for the hugs and notes my nieces and nephew gave me. I know you guys read this so know that your expressions of love and the timing of your visit wasn’t lost on me. I am so thankful for all of you.Now, on to tomorrow…

09.28.07Paramount Theater Denver, COwith special guests Eddie Money & Scandal

That’s the day after my 10th wedding anniversary. My best friend lives in the Denver area…. too good to be true? Will the hubby go for it? That remains to be seen. Tix go on sale June 30. We’ll have to think about it.I finally got a comment from someone other than a family member today! She tells me that her life changed in July of 1982, too. Ha ha! If she only knew! That was 25 years ago and I remember it as if it were yesterday and it’s become the stuff of family lore… how I wallpapered my room with Rick’s picture. My bedroom door was taken down to preserve my teenage insanity. I will say that I certainly was devoted – I managed to see him over 6 times in concert and I stomached Hard to Hold who knows how many times. The movie, technically was pretty bad but you got to see his tushie and when you’re 13 years old, that is pretty major! HA! About 7 years ago, my sister and I commemorated our first Rick concert by seeing him at the State Fair here in Utah…2nd Row center stage!! Rick jumped into the audience and stood on the chair next to me. I was so stunned I couldn’t even think of touching him. Meanwhile my sister got a nice little hip wiggle right in her face. She was mortified. I was jealous…AH! The memories!!